JA IM JAAAMMIN. I JAAAMMIN. UNT I HOPE CHEW LIKE JAAAAMMIN TOO!!!
VAT IS UP EVERYPOTY!? ZIS VEEK I CO TO CHAMAICA. CHAMAICA IS A LOFELY PLACE KNOWN FOR ITS TEEP HISTORY, WARM VEAZER, REKKAE MUSIC, PEAUTY, KANCHA, UNT PLACK PEOPLE.
LETS TAKE A LOOK AT VAT ZE AFERACHE CHAMAICAN LOOK LIKE:
MY FRIENT LITTLE CHEW COMETIAN CILPERT COTTFRIET CALL DEM RASTAFARIAN SCHVARTZAS. RASTAFARIANS ARE KNOWN FOR DERE DISTINCT LACK OF CROOMINK, SHOWUHINK, UNT ZE CROWTH OF NEW FORMS OF ARACHNITS IN DERE TREDLOCKS.
DERE TREDLOCKS ARE ACTUALLY FERY USEFUL FOR A FARIETY OF PURPOSES. VE USE DEM TO MAKE PREDATOR OUTFIT, I USE DEM TO CHUMP ROPE, COWPOYS USE DEM TO ROPE CATTLE, UNT CHAMAICA'S FAFORITE EXPORT CRACE CHONES USED TO SMOKE DEM VHEN SHE VAS VASN'T ENTERTAININK OFFERS OF PUTTSEX ON ZE SET OF CONAN ZE TESTROYUH. SHE USET TO SAY IT VAS ZE PEST HIGH SHE EFER HAT, EVEN THOUGH SHE HAD TO PULL OUT ZE ODD SPLIT ENT OR TWO OUT OF HER SROAT.
ZE VOMEN OF CHAMAICA HAFE A NATURAL STYLE APOUT DEM. ON MY FLIGHT MARIA SHRIFER UNT I HAVE ZIS VOMAN SITTINK NEXT TO US:
LOOK AT ZIS PAIN IN ZE ASS. ZIS PITCH'S AFRO VAS SO PIG IT KEPT HITTING MARIA SHRIFER IN ZE HEAD. EFERYTIME MARIA SHRIFER START TO FALL ASLEEP ZIS VOMAN'S FRO VOULT SMACK INTO HER. ZIS VAS FOLLOWET PY SHAKA ZULU OFER HERE CIVINK MARIA SHRIFER A TIRTY LOOK AS IF HER 1972 FRO VAS MADE OF PURE 24 KARAT GOLD. HER ENORMOUS ASS ALSO TOOK UP MARIA SHRIFERS WHOLE SEAT SO SHE SIT ON MY LAP WHOLE FLIGHT. CUTTLINK MIT MARIA SHRIFER MEAN HER CHIN CUT UP MY FACE SO MUCH IT LOOK LIKE I TRY TO SHAFE AFTER A WEEK OF TRINKINK SHPATEN POMBS AT OKTOPERFEST!
ONCE WE COT TO CHAMAICA I CO TO PEACH. ONE ZING I NOTICE LOTS OF PEOPUL RELAX ALOT UNT DEY CET REALLY FLAPPY. I TOOK SOME PICTURES TO SHOW YOU. HERE IS ONE OF FAT SUCAR TATTY:
JAAAAA HE HAFING SOME TROUPLE TONT CHEW SINK? LET'S SEE IF ZE LATIES ARE APLE TO CET HIM TO STANT UP:
EVEN MORE HILARIOUS IS THE CHIC CIKKULINK AT CHAIR ON PUTT. LET'S SEE IF ONE FINAL EFFORT COULD HELP OUR FUPTASTIC FRIENT:
I'VE HEART OF HAVINK A MANKEY ON YOUR PACK PUT DAT IS RITICULOUS! I VONTER HOW HE WIPE IS PUTTHOLE AFTER POOPY TIME? MAYPE HIS POOPIE SO PIG IT WILL FORCE CHAIR OFF OF HIM?
PUT OF COURSE ON ZE PEACH, DERE CHUNKLES, DERE CHUNKLES EFERYVHERE, DEY TONT EFEN KNOW ZEY ARE CHUNKLES. ZIS PAPE MIT HER TROOPY MCCOOPIES VAS PARTICULARLY MEMORAPLE:
SHE TRIPPED ALOT VEN SHE CET UP TO CO SWIMMINK. I LIKED VATCHINK HER TO ZE PACKFLOAT.
DEN I SEE HER SLEEPINK...FACE TOWN...UNT I COT CREAT ITEA. I SNEAK UP PEHINT HER...UNT TIE HER POOPIES UP IN A KNOT PEHIND HER PACK!!! JAHAHAHAHA!!! SINCE SHE VAS SLEEPINK SHE TITN'T KNOW I DO IT. SO SHE COME UP TO ME AND ASK ME TO UNTIE DEM FOR HER...
CHAMAICA MOST FAMOUS FOR ITS POT. CHEW CAN PUY A COOT TOOPIE FROM CAP TRIFER, PUS TRIFER, PEACH CUY, POOL CUY, CARPAGE CUY, ZE MAIT, ZE COLF CADDY, ZE COLF PRO, ZE TOLPHIN TRAINER, UNT ZE HORSEY TRAINER. PRETTY MUCH EFERYPOTY EXCEPT FOR YOUR PUTLER. PUTLER IS RESPECTAPLE MAN IN CHAMAICA.
IN ANY CASE DEY SELL ME ZIS:
JAAAA IT ACTUALLY CALLED CHUNKLE!!!!! I SO EXCITED I SMOKE EET RIGHT AVAY. I CET ALL HAZY VEN I PUFF EET. I CO INTO COUGHING FIT. MY EYES TEAR. VHEN I FINALLY COME TOO I SEE CHAMAICAN PALL PUSTER FROM MY FLIGHT:
SHE CHUST SAY, "JA MON!"
DEN SHE TAKE ZE ENTIRE WAD OF CHUNKLE, ROLL IT UP INTO ZE PIGGEST TOOPIE I HAFE EFER SEEN, UNT SHOVE IT IN HER CHUNKLE. I WATCH IN TISPELIEF AS HER FACHINA START PUFFINK ON ZIS CHUMBO SIZED TOOPIE. SHE PULL TOOPIE OUT OF HER CHUNKLE UNT DEN CHUNKLE STARTS TALKING TO ME:
"ARNOLD!" SAYS ZE CHUNKLE. " YOU HAVE BEEN THE GREATEST ALLY THE CHUNKLES HAVE EVER KNOWN. YOU SPEAK SO FONDLY OF US, REGALING US IN SUCH POETIC FASHION AS YOU DO. CHUNKLES ARE NOW CONSIDERED TO BE A DELICACY OF THE SEXUAL PALETTE. IN THE PAST 3 MONTHS, SALES OF FAT WOMAN PORN HAVE TRIPLED, CANKLE PORN QUADRUPLED, AND SALES OF FAT BLACK WOMAN PORN NEARLY QUINTUPLED." "DO YOU THINK IT'S ANY COINCIDENCE THAT PEOPLE ACTUALLY WATCH THAT MOVIE PRECIOUS WITH SUCH ENDEARING EYES? YOU MIGHT THINK IT IS YOUR DESTINY TO BE PRESIDENT IN 2016, BUT THANKS YOUR REGALING TALES OF CHUNKLES YOU WILL CRUMBLE UNDER THE POWER OF A NEWLY FAT AND FULLY OPERATIONAL CHUNKLE!"
ARNOLD: "AUUGGHHH...IT...CAN'T...PE"
CHAMAICAN CHUNKLE: "YES, IT IS!!!"
"OOOOOOOOOOOPRAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
JA, MAYPE I NO SMOKE CHUNKLE ANYMORE.
UNT ANY CASE VAT WOULT A CHUNKLE PE MITOUT A CHUNKLE? IN HONOR OF CHAMAICA YOUR CHUNKLE OF ZE VEEK IS CELLUTASTIC:
BLACK CELLULITE, ZE PROUTEST UNT CREASYEST OF ALL CELLULITE.
I COT TO CO...CHUNKLE POT CIVE ME ZE MANCHIES DAT NOT EFEN DAT FAT PUTT CAN STOP!
-AHNOLT
No comments:
Post a Comment